Help for parents
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About the author
told by his mother
Matt was diagnosed as
ADHD during his kindergarten year and soon after that he was diagnosed
as severely emotionally handicapped. My parents are from
Tennessee and have little education. They didn't understand this,
saying that Matt was spoiled and that I favored him over my other two
kids, Christi and Bobby. Matt's dad has been out of his life
since Matt was 4 and has made it very clear that he doesn't want any of
the kids in his life.
With my parents always saying this about Matt in front of the other
kids, the other kids would beat him up daily, often to the point of
bruises and cuts. The more I tried to stop it, the worse it
got. I tried my hardest, but very immature to have kids when I
did, I am sure I didn't handle things the right way.
As a result of Matt's
home life, when he was a teenager, he would stay out until early in the
mornings. He had a very bad attitude so he didn't make friends
very well. He was always defensive and would say and do things
just to fit in and to be accepted.
I trusted the juvenile people at the court and at the detention center.
They told me that the only way that I could get help for Matt was to
report him for everything he did.
My daughter Christi was grown and had her own place. Matt liked a girl
that lived downstairs from her, and she needed him to baby sit.
Christi would buy Matt cigarettes to baby sit. Matt was 14.
Christi had tried to say that Matt had touched her daughter Jordyn
before, and she had tried to call children's services but they didn't
find any evidence of Matt touching her. Well Christi had been in
a fight with her then boyfriend and when she came home from work she
said that Matt had touched Jordyn again. She called me and when I
asked her not to yell it in front of the man I was dating, she called
the police. She said that I just wanted to protect Tom and my
angel Matt. Another family member very close to Matt had touched
Matt and has touched my nephew and Christi doesn't mind this.
Matt was taken to the police station and I was told that he was not
going to be arrested--that they just wanted to talk to him. I was
told that I didn't need to be there. Not knowing that this was a
set up and how they do this to minors all the time here, I believed
them. I came home from work and Matt was not home. I called and
was told that he admitted to everything and was arrested. Matt
didn't admit to anything, he was coerced into it.
To this day I fight hard for my son. He is on lifetime probation and is never
allowed to live at home again. He has been in homeless shelters
and may be in one again. I am working hard to pay for an attorney
and to pay for his hotel. My older kids say that I do too much
for Matt and aren't speaking to me because of it. My daughter was
wanting to talk to Matt and wanted to help him because a lot of what is
in Matt's police report is not true. But now after a fight with
me she isn't going to. She said if she has to hurt Matt to hurt
me then so be it. If you ask me that is why she did this in
the first place. I am currently trying to get Matt home. He
is very depressed and angry, worse now than he ever was, and he needs
job training and counseling for him and not the so-called "sex offender
This has torn my family apart. My two younger kids and I want
Matt home. I am having to pay his bills and they punish him for
that too. He is isolated from the world. If he has even
male friends he has to tell them what he has done. It is hard
here and Arizona could care less about their kids. Pray for my
Submitted September 4, 2005